Here’s a beastly souvenir from my first visit with a plastic surgeon who could be working in tandem with my oncologist. Yeah, that’s a balled up tissue in my fist.
I know that’s depressing, so I did you a favor and included my suggestion of a Michael Jackson skin graft and the note for PE class [...]
Archive for March, 2009
Melanoma Diary.
Posted in Cancer, Health, Horror, Melanoma on March 31, 2009 | 12 Comments »
Cautionary Fail.
Posted in Film, Health, Horror, Links, Movies, Music, Vices on March 26, 2009 | 6 Comments »
I always just assumed my cautionary tale would be something like:
1. Daddy’s name is Huggy Bear! Stay away from ecstasy!
2. Grandma was right! Don’t stand too close to the microwave! My eyes have fingernails!
3. Pay attention in Health class! I got __(insert STD here)__ from that time I had unprotected sex with __(insert name here)__ in the [...]
Like a surgeon.
Posted in America, Childhood, Health, Horror, Links, Music, Pets, Poop on March 17, 2009 | 4 Comments »
That song was playing overhead in the skin surgeon’s office while the doc excavated a couple areas on my birthmark. It’s been the shape of Australia standing alone for quite some time, so when Papua New Guinea suddenly popped up they said, “Get your ass in here, Swartz” or something to that effect.
I tried [...]
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